Wednesday, August 3, 2011

The waiting.

Waiting for my babies to be born is not easy. I admit, it was easier with the first two. This time, however, I was certain that #3 would make his or her arrival well before my due date. I just knew it. Yeah, that just about sums up my "mother's intuition"! Ha! I had not been nervous about the arrival of #3 because I had planned everything out. I have meals ready, my pantry is stocked, the essentials are loaded up on, and I had plenty of help lined up... but it all hinged on #3 coming a bit early, at least on time. As my plans began to unravel so did I.. just a bit. I called the midwife to ask about scheduling an induction, but that isn't a possibility at this point so I have been forced to take a step back and think about who is in control of this whole thing in the first place. It's not me, surprise, surprise. I have wrestled with scripture, knowing that it says that we can ask for anything and it will be given to us, but Jesus also says "not my will but Yours be done". Yesterday it was as if I found a place for my heart to rest:

"Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places, surely I have a delightful inheritance."
Psalm 16:5-6

I am not in control, but God is. Not only is he in control, but my lot is secure and so is my unborn child's. I was resting in knowing that I had help lined up for 6 weeks, but that is not God's plan this time around and his boundary lines for this pregnancy have fallen in pleasant places. I can smile at the future (Prov 31) because I rest in God's plan, not my own planning. Hallelujah.